Gracie Lou, Who?

There are times you need to be in this gracious state of mind. Kind, polite, bloody considerate state of mind. All the times someone asks you to "be blunt" (because hey, he can take it, make no mistake of that!), all the times you're expected to tick off a 10yr old but do it all nice and mature (i.e. with patience and blood vessels intact), all the times you're asked to make that one last cup of tea (or hang washed clothes out to dry :| ) when you're running late, all the times a friend behaves like a jackass and what you really wanna do is slap HARD... All the times you click the Social Interview tab on Facebook, for fuck's sake!

And since I haven't been Shweta G. Sharma in quite a while, what you get for this visit to my blog is stuff that generally manages to cheer me up, pack rat that I am. Marginally, atleast :P It ups my sillyness levels for the next half hour or so, and since that's more than what Vodafone can do...

Thing is, I keep planning to upload them but then decide to wait for the next one to make a show. Ab bas! :P

Hope you smile, even if no one's watching =)

Cookie Monster! Awesomeness


"HNY" :P


Sesame Street, Year 40


Oscaaaar!


Series of postcards (Google's getting old) - here because they were there :P









When Bapu = Birthday Boy? :|


ELMO!


Count von Count. Oh you bloody fool, count!



Just her name picks me up! Boombah Chamki :D



Happy 'kite festival', where kite festival = holiday with gajak, popcorn and movies :D


PS - The G dissecting my name? Grace. Shweta Grace Sharma. See? Vodafone reference? The tagline 'Happy to help'. Yes, I suck. =)

Snortdom I Provide

Go ahead, relate ;)

Today, I was about to propose. I got on my knee in front of my girlfriend and opened the box. My friend thought it would be funny to replace the ring with a condom. FML

Today, I texted my Dad to tell him I'm staying at my boyfriend's house and won't be home. Since I had predictive text on, my phone didn't quite get the word 'home' - the message I sent said, 'I'm staying at Will's, I'll not be good tonight.' FML

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML

Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop and I noticed that there was a bug on the guys face in front of me. Trying to be nice I lightly smacked it off. His reaction was to punch me in the face. Repeatedly. FML

Today, when my boyfriend and I were becoming intimate, his cat decides to jump onto the bed and lie right in between us. He then informs me that he wanted to stop to "preserve his cat's innocence." FML

Today, I was standing outside a store about to flirt with this guy when my mother drove up and shouted,"Hurry up, I have diarrhoea!" FML

Today, I looked at my house in Google Street View for the first time and noticed an unfamiliar vehicle in the driveway. When I asked my wife about it, she admitted to have an ongoing affair. Apparently the entire world knew my wife was having an affair before I did. FML

Today, I took my first day off in 3 weeks just so I can sleep in. The office secretary woke me up at 7.12 am with a page wishing me a nice day off. FML

Today, my sister and I got into a fight. I came home to find everything in my room covered in ketchup. FML

-

Related post of interest - Entertainment Pimp. Of Sorts.

Why Does This Feel Like A Hint?

Larger view ke vaaste click on image or here.

Do revert. :|

Euphoria!

:) yeh kya tha?

Did, but why suddenly? You under the notion that I don't often enough?

And why should I? *insert update* Maybe I should.

:) Why am I doing that again??

I needed that *hug* :)

:) & :) & :) & :) & :) So when do we see you?

Aww be awesomely random just like that!!

I just did! :-) Now tell me why I did!

In response to :

Smile. Just like that :)

20-odd characters texted to 20-odd randomly picked friends on a giddy Thursday evening. It was one of those things you do just because. You know, for the random happiness quotient involved, reason be damned. And yippee, in came a solid flurry of responses!

You should try this.

So go ahead, give out random smiles, hug the ones you care about without waiting for a 'specific, valid reason' to come by, tell people you love them, appreciate them, spend time together, grin at all the things you want to, laugh out loud anytime it seems like a good idea to, do something nice simply because you can, do things you love simply because you can! Let the giddiness out, be a kid when you want to be, get that euphoria flowing!!

PS - Some aww/giggle-inducing replies have been left out, make up your own ;)

JB On Ho Gaya!

I admire and look up to and envy people who know what they want.

* JB = Jealousy Button. Term - courtesy Rachna.

The Virtues That Aren't

In some sort of continuation...

Needing -or atleast wanting- to be around people who 'match up to my standards'? It's true. I call them people with whom I share a certain wavelength, have the same intellectual frequency, but what the heck, call 'em what you will.

I just don't see why I should subject myself to people that I suspect I will develop contempt or pity for beyond a certain level of interaction. They don't deserve either simply because they happen to think and function differently. They probably think I'm too logical and scientific for my own good. Yes, I've been told that. *Logical and scientific? Amusement to the rescue!* Hell, I don't deserve to be stuck with mediocrity simply because that's how most people are!

This is not a claim to superiority. Anything but. There are plenty in the world who are more intelligent, more competent than I and I can live with that. But just like them, I would like to surround myself with people at the roughly same level of thought and reason, if not higher. I want a certain degree of competence, I want a certain degree of intelligence, I want a certain degree of sense. Sue me.

This is not to say that people I don't see as freq-mates are inferior in any way, they're just not like me. Just as they would choose not to associate with me beyond a point, I choose not to associate with them beyond a point. I bore them, they bore me.

Being the polar opposite of judgemental is a virtue. There is no antonym for the word because there's too much ambiguity around what the term judgemental itself should mean. Are we discussing (and passing judgement on :P) someone who passed judgement -do bear in mind that judgement can be positive or negative- on another's conduct or someone who passed a negative judgement? The former would be the literal meaning, but ho!

Again, expecting something specific is anti-virtue. Virtue? To embrace all that comes your way, simply because it's there. Are you fucking kidding me?

General acceptance is one thing - this is also how people are. Individual acceptance another - this is what XYZ is like and I am open to being with XYZ/putting up with XYZ . That sounds like tolerance, which in turn sounds derogatory - none of this is meant to be. But wholehearted acceptance that reads "XYZ is someone I admire/look up to, genuinely like and want to be with!" is another ball game altogether. 

Why must we force ourselves into believing we are all the same?

Why can't we be honest about this?

What The Judges Really Meant

November 22 to November 29. 8 days in the company of an assortment of people. Some that I just knew will be friends for the next three years of the course and beyond, some that I never got around to interacting with before, some that I had instinctively marked as people I ain't gonna get up close and chatty with and then some that I never knew existed. Equations and opinions were formed, newly invalidated equations and opinions changed and like the previous post made evident, albeit dramatically, there were revelations galore. 

One of those revelations was part of this game we -a dozen batchmates, some from each of the first three categories I mentioned above- played to kill time in the middle of the night. Mention positives and negatives, atleast one of each, about everyone present. Bitch, but to their faces. Get downright nasty, but be nice. What got the game started is of no relevance now. Cutting straight to the revelation - I'm perceived as judgemental since I tend to categorize people as per their apparent intelligence. Also, I give off an air of assumed superiority when I'm around people who I think don't match up to my standards.

As for how far this is true - yep, how much basic intellect shows through in casual conversations matters to me. I have nothing against people who come across as slow or are, in the words of those who gave the verdict, "not upto my level". I'm as friendly with them as with the others, but I sure do have an opinion about how much sense they're capable of dishing out.

The opinion is open to change, of course it is, but I'm not waiting around for something to happen before I form one. The person himself is enough of an event.

How far the tag of 'judgemental' is accurate, I can't tell. What's laughable is that the entire game was based on how judgemental we are. Perceptive, if the word makes you happy. Those two hours were full of variations of "I don't really know you well.. never spoken na somehow.. atleast until tonight.. but I think negatives mein, you're like this---". Until tonight? Admission and distribution of judgement, check.

Funny thing is, when I spoke to the same friends later about this forming opinions and categorizing business, it turned out that they all had an opinion -similar or not- about the same person but never "thought of it". So because I think it out consciously and am vocal about it, I'm judgemental. As of now, lets just say I'm lost to the concept of anyone being judgemental. 

Funnier still, the general consensus about me went this way - Positives? Intelligence. Negative? Too intelligent and looks for the same around her. Like wait, what?!

Being human, I'd like to make it known that my positives and negatives both included things other than to do with my brain. We'll discuss them over a cup of coffee sometime.

How far these opinions of me were actually thought out by everyone present, I do not know. It could have been a personal opinion for each one of them. It could be that some went with the opinion another announced simply because it was an easier alternative to thinking. It doesn't matter.

-

It isn't like opinions of everyone out there matter. What I'm like -the good and the bad- is what I'm like, regardless of what they think I'm like, so that's cool. Again, not even half of them are friends I'm close to, so they haven't had much of a chance to give out an informed opinion, good or bad. It was the overall interpretation of the trait of being judgemental that got to me. And since I don't see what's wrong with it, it got to me some more.

All Must Be Revealed!

More than anything else, the last 3 weeks have been full of revelations. With friends and classmates as well as the unavoidable friends-or-what candidate of the month and those involved. And what amazes me is that beyond a point, I don't feel a thing about the situation or the people concerned. Except maybe amusement.

Logically dekho toh I should be analysing and introspecting until I reach the pot of gold that's supposed to be the Answer, but right now the rainbow seems so vague that I can't trace it right. And somehow, I'm not too concerned about getting waylaid by chance puffs of clouds and gusts of wind. It borders on fun, actually.

Instead, I'm indifferent. Chirpy one minute, sober the next, but always able to see things objectively. A little too objectively. I have no personal opinion on these issues, only an objective one. Somehow, I've managed to numb myself to all of it. And I don't know how. 

I remember talking to a friend about the oh-so-detached, "I feel numb" theory months ago and being mocked incessantly so I'm expecting more of the same. But I simply do not feel like I'm affected in any way. Comfortably Numb, anyone? :|

So I don't discuss it with anyone. Heh, no one person know about more than one 'issue' at hand and that's how I intend to keep it. That logic says a breakdown will follow is hardly of significance right now. Lets just assume I'll get to that bridge, catch sight of that rainbow again and reach The Pot. Simple.

Craziest bit is that I want to write about it all. I expect it will help. I want to know how people manage to bare all. Everytime I do, I fuck up things so bad it's safer not to. So basically, I'm looking for catharsis where I don't want it. Revelation indeed.

PS- This post was of a more personal nature than any before, I realise that. Consider this a one off, ain't gonna happen. Also, I may have gone overboard with my skyscape analogy but hey, deal with it.

Why I Miss Orkut.

CASE I

"woww....so sweeeet profile....oopss ur wondering that who is this?welll u dont know mee & aslo i,i just came & saw ur profile,mere maaan ne kaha ki tumeh ek msg karu baaaas meine kiya,isake alawa kuch nahi,i swear...i know this is bad manners for that i m heartlyy soorrryyy...anywasys telll mekaise ho?hows mummy papa & all?tumhe freee time to nahi milta hoga that i know,fir bhi agar time mile to ek msg jarur karna...reat all is fine here,chalo im have to go now,give my regards to mummmy papa,byeee shwetaaaaaaa.."

He is frendly (sic), reads fictions (sic), sections pertaining to movies and music consist of the ultimate, DDLJ. 'Very right-conservative' political views, prefers 'minimal fashion'. What he probably thought 'right' and 'minimal' mean on here is up for discussion. The sicness.

Ah man. Rest all is fine there, so reassuring. I'm off to give mummy papa the dude's regards.

CASE II

"HI !!!

TO YOU 

BY SAM"

To Sir, With Love. Need I say more?

CASE III

hi shweta, i m viral from vashi, i like u r profile and interested to know u further if u like my profile accept me and hope to see you sooner online or something... take care..

Ahha! What 'something' are we talking about, me love?

CASE IV

kehne ki ho dil main koi baath mujhse kaho koi pal ho din ho ya ho raath mujhse kaho koi mushkil koi pareshani aaye tumhe lage kuch teek halaath mujhse kaho koi ho tammanna ya ho koi aarzoo rehna kabhi na bekhraar MAIN HOOO NAAAAAAAAA ---- HIIII 2 EVERY LETS WISH SHAHRUKH A VERY HAPPY N PROPEROUS HAPPYY BIRTHDAY

Aise integrated community efforts aur kahaan?

CASE V

In response to a "Who the hell are you?" scrap, which was sent in response to a "make friendship with me gul" scrap, I get -

i m a boy studing in tenth staying in vashi anything else

C'mon now, you don't really need me to put in a concluding wall of text for this post... :D

Wake Up!

But only to smell the roses. Make that cinnamon for those of you with refined tastes.

That my father thought it was a waste of time didn’t matter. That he would’ve preferred a Govinda flick with double entendres that he thought only he could comprehend is a different, laughable matter altogether. That my mother is the coolest thing ever and liked it too says volumes about her awesomeness. That my sister missed catching a different “cute guy” on the screen every other minute was irrelevant. Yeah, she’s in that phase… no dope on me, nope.

Getting back to the point, I loved the movie! And that is why you will get a bit by bit review that hopefully, will NOT include the story, dialogues and picturisation. Yep, I’m bullshitting you.

Since it’s a review, it will obviously include MY opinions, my sentiments, my POV. So don’t go looking for generalizations and politically correct “IMO”s. You want a view, you shell out 150 + travel charges. Simple as that. And now that that’s clear... :P

Since beating around the bush to tell you it’s a review post took three whole paragraphs, I’ll do what I can to keep the actual review short. Sum it up for you in 7 words –

Light – No pakaoing you with stooopid jackassery or “Ma ki mamta” bhashans. For a change, no one gets married, shot at or conks off.

Fast – Props to the director and screenplay chappies. Also the scriptwriter. Normal, believable, everyday stuff yet stuff I aww-ed over just the same.

Real – Relatable. From the occasional brat to the kid out to prove out a point, it was all stuff I could relate to. Made me happy, made me watch, made me happy. 

Voltage – For me, personally *wink*, it was one of those charge-you-up-and-make-you-wanna-DO-something! films. I’m not talking “inspiring” like Gandhi-Lincoln type ka inspiring. Not the idealist activism sorta charge either, though I’m sure it could manage that… yeah I’m loyal man, back ‘em to the hilt. Like Taare Zameen Par was the creative + idealist DO something, Rang De Basanti was more idealistic... the creative DO something kicked in only on seeing the graffiti. Par atleast today, it was the sort of voltage that reminded me of all the chota mota projects I had in mind for my Dad’s perennially on-loan camera, my wall-and-door décor, pending articles, gifts et al. I am erupting with ideas! Most likely the sort I’ll forget by 8 am, but fuck it, someone has to hand me a pencil.

Happy – Yeah, good ol’ Bollywood. Much as it may differ from a typical Bollywood masala flick, fact remains happy endings have got to happen. They were made for the emosunal janta of India, dammit! So yeah, you’re 10 minutes into the movie and you already know he’ll reunite with his family, get together with his new pal, get the job of his dreams, ya da ya da ya da. Cool. Now stuff it and predict outfit colours scenewise and in silence. 

Ooh yeah, I’m mean in the middle of the night…

One last thing, the apartment! All light, fresh, happy looking and totally inhabitable - you could believe the characters were the ones who put it all together. Doesn't get better than that. What bets the crew and all worked on it too? 

Another last thing, don’t EVER let pesky li’l pests stop you from sitting through the title track / spesal song/ bloopers they show as the credits roll. People don’t seem to understand that’s part of the screening time they’ve paid up for… so you stay back. Enjoy it! Aur kuch nahi toh usher ko zyaada time AC ka fayda hoga…

So yeah, my take - Go Watch. I say you wont miss the popcorn. =)